Cocky the Pheasant!

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“Pinch, Punch, First of the Month, no returns, rabbits and hares” …and pheasants! The old children’s saying has probably been banned by now but with a small addition it could sum up the beginning of February here on the farm. It is traditionally a month of discontent and bad weather, however for Cocky our friendly pheasant in the garden it means he’s safe from someones pot for another year…

“I’m safer this morning thank goodness,
than I was the day before,
not from the Bard you understand me,
‘cos he couldn’t hit a barn door!

The other day on the drive,
I stood in front of his car,
he opened his door to ‘shoo’ me,
I asked him ‘are we going far?’

I tried to get in through the window,
then had a go at the door,
he drove off at last without me,
leaving me all angry and sore!

I shouldn’t bite the hand that feeds me,
wheat and all sorts of grain,
but the shooting season is now over,
and I’m free to bully him again!”

Having not picked up a gun in years the world is a safer place and the barn door has been mended! If Cocky Pheasant comes at me again I may be forced to swear at him!

© Baldock Bard 2018
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