Turkey Tales 2: Alvin the Turkey!


Alvin the TurkeyWhen we used to rear turkeys for the Christmas market (see yesterday’s blog http://bit.ly/JzUDDr ). The close proximity of turkeys from August to December had a profound effect. By the time the last turkey had left the building on Christmas Eve, you were even dreaming about turkey, turkey turkey! Late one evening after many hours in the plucking shed, Mrs Bard collapsed exhausted in the chair, the cat jumped onto her lap and she attempted to pluck the moggie (which actually enjoyed the close attention). By Christmas Eve the rare hallucinogenic qualities associated with too much close contact with turkey was evident. The only cure being a session of cold turkey…

Alvin the Turkey wore glasses,
Without them he’d miss the path,
All the farm animals used to do pointing:
“There goes Alvin with Glasses,” they’d laugh!

Doreen his mother was a wise one,
Unfortunately she was also long dead,
She used to scold him at mealtimes,
Shouting “don’t gobble your food” and she said:

“If you take care of your figure,
You’ll be on the right side of thinner!
You’ll keep your voice and always rejoice,
And you’ll never become Christmas Dinner!”

© Baldock Bard 2013
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