The Yeti Generation!

Posted on February 23, 2017 by The Baldock Bard.

I have noticed that amongst those newly-retired of my generation there is a tendency to drive a make of car that thirty years ago would have not been considered. The new darling of the Sixty-plus is the Skoda Yeti. Nearing retirement, get your order in now…

We’re the Yeti Generation,
we remember better times!
Sunny summer days,
and poetry that rhymes.
Now many are retired,
we enjoy a scotch and soda!
And of course its obligatory,
we have to drive a Skoda!

Pensions at the ready folks, follow the trend to the Czech Republic!

© Baldock Bard 2017
For more from the Baldock Bard click on ‘Home’ above 
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Twitter: @baldockbard
E-mail: simon.holtom@btconnect.com
The Baldock Boot Sale
SG7 6RD
is the friendliest bargain bonanza anywhere!
BACK AFTER EASTER
From April to October 2017
With more FREE parking and a field full of bargains!
www.u-boot.co.uk

Spring Cleaning!

Posted on February 22, 2017 by The Baldock Bard.

I’m often being asked, ‘What do you do during the winter?’. One important job is to deep-clean the grain store. Once this is done it can be inspected and we can be ‘Crop Assured’. This means every load of crop that leaves the farm can carry a ‘Crop Assured’ sticker on the paperwork. That load will be traceable, at any stage, back to this farm and the customer can be assured that I’ve done things right and followed all the rules…

For the last few weeks,
we have been,
giving the grain store,
its annual deep clean.
First we sweep,
then sweep again,
not a bad job,
during winter rain.
Elevators, tunnels,
conveyors too,
all have to be clean,
almost as new!
Then it’s inspected,
to make sure it’s clean,
and we can sell crops,
so traceability’s seen!
So that’s why my hair looks so grey, it doesn’t need colouring, it’s just dust. (That’s my explanation and I’m sticking to it!)

© Baldock Bard 2017
For more from the Baldock Bard click on ‘Home’ above 
Facebook: Baldock Bard
Twitter: @baldockbard
E-mail: simon.holtom@btconnect.com

The Baldock Boot Sale
SG7 6RD
is the friendliest bargain bonanza anywhere!
BACK AFTER EASTER
From April to October 2017
With more FREE parking and a field full of bargains!
www.u-boot.co.uk

Using Your Oko!

Posted on February 21, 2017 by The Baldock Bard.

The first time I heard the phrase ‘Get your Oko up’ was when I worked on a Cambridgeshire farm in the seventies. The phrase meant to use anger to accomplish a job that was either unpleasant or needed extra strength. Yesterday I had one of those jobs to do and used anger to help me…

I had some sawn up logs to move,
nobody near – nothing to prove,
and so I needed extra strength,
for large cut rounds and corded length

Before I started a cold-call rude,
helped to put me in the mood,
and as I lifted the heavy wood,
my back was questioning if I should!

I remembered something that made me cross,
the wood became light as candy floss!
All I can say it goes to show,
use up that Oko you’ll be nice to know!

Have a good day and use that Oko to the best effect!
© Baldock Bard 2017
For more from the Baldock Bard click on ‘Home’ above 
Facebook: Baldock Bard
Twitter: @baldockbard
E-mail: simon.holtom@btconnect.com
The Baldock Boot Sale
SG7 6RD
is the friendliest bargain bonanza anywhere!
BACK AFTER EASTER
From April to October 2017
With more FREE parking and a field full of bargains!
www.u-boot.co.uk

Monday Morning Mess!

Posted on February 20, 2017 by The Baldock Bard.

Monday mornings always seem to come as a shock. Despite knowing for many hours that it was on its way it still surprises. In our case it doesn’t help that we have a naughty puppy that’s not a puppy anymore. All the food she inhails seems to turn to naughtiness in her stomach. Then when she is caught being bad she puts on ‘sorry’ display to rival that of a West-End actor…

Monday morning the kitchen’s a mess,
the puppy had gone berserk,
bed-stuffing was scattered all over the room,
and I had to get to work.
“Bad Puppy!” I whispered under my breath,
“Grrr, you are so bad!”
and then I gave her a biscuit,
my telling off made her look sad!
So on my hands and knees to tidy,
before coffee or cereal or toast,
and suddenly I had a lick on my nose,
it seems she loves me the most!

Enjoy your Monday, stay safe and happy out there!

© Baldock Bard 2017
For more from the Baldock Bard click on ‘Home’ above 
Facebook: Baldock Bard
Twitter: @baldockbard
E-mail: simon.holtom@btconnect.com

The Baldock Boot Sale
SG7 6RD
is the friendliest bargain bonanza anywhere!
BACK AFTER EASTER
From April to October 2017
With more FREE parking and a field full of bargains!
www.u-boot.co.uk

Spring Seed!

Posted on February 17, 2017 by The Baldock Bard.

All our spring-sown seed is now in the barn ready for drilling. There is always a fair amount of luck involved when choosing varieties. Despite all the evidence from producer, seller, research establishments or agronomist, you never know just how a new variety will suit your soil. Both of our spring varieties we grew last year with reasonable results, so here we go again…

Spring is around the corner,
we know that it is near,
because we’ve had deliveries,
all the spring-sown seed is here.

Six tons of Canyon Spring Oats,
Eight tons of Vertigo Beans,
the oats will be for breakfast,
the beans will make proteins.

But first we need dry weather,
I once knew a man called Fred,
who said to me many years ago:
“Seed will never grow in the shed!”

Enjoy a great weekend wherever you are and whatever you’re doing.

The Close Call!

Posted on February 16, 2017 by The Baldock Bard.

Yesterday on the way to take an ancient relative to the doctor, I came across two vehicles coming straight at me! Natrually I was a little concerned that their actions might just pose a threat to life – mine! When I returned home, while recounting the tale to my nearest and dearest, I remembered it was captured on the dashcam and it wasn’t just a bad dream…

Coming out of Baldock
towards the nearest junction,
I beheld a sight, that caused me fright,
almost caused a function!
A lorry coming at me,
I thought a crash was certain,
I thought “Sh*t, this is it!
maybe this is curtains!”
I was overreacting,
no morbid thoughts a-linger
as he drove past, still quite fast,
he gave me the finger!

If you’re driving, be careful, it’s a dangerous world out there!

© Baldock Bard 2017
For more from the Baldock Bard click on ‘Home’ above 
Facebook: Baldock Bard
Twitter: @baldockbard
E-mail: simon.holtom@btconnect.com

The Baldock Boot Sale
SG7 6RD
is the friendliest bargain bonanza anywhere!
BACK AFTER EASTER
From April to October 2017
With more FREE parking and a field full of bargains!
www.u-boot.co.uk

The Snowman!

Posted on February 13, 2017 by The Baldock Bard.

Yesterday my daughter and granddaughter made a snowman. There hadn’t been a great fall and so much energy was expounded in rolling two great snowballs for a great distance around the garden. However by midday the head had fallen off and the fine gentleman was on the way to becoming a mere memory.

The 12th of February is a date that evokes sad memories for our family. It was on this day, just before midnight, that we had that dreaded knock on the door and a policeman bearing the news that our son, David, had been killed in a car crash at the age of just 22.

I suspect there are some lucky people, who haven’t experienced this situation, who may consider that after 14 years we should ‘be over it by now’ as don’t they say ‘time is a great healer‘? Well I guess that in my case time doesn’t heal, it just makes the memories harder to recall and the ‘what may have been’ all the more difficult to comprehend. It also makes you realise that there are things in life that are more precious than money or material possessions.

Every time I see in the media that a youngster has lost his/her life in a car my thoughts are for the family who are about to embark on one of the hardest journeys they’ll ever face. They will miss the opportunity to say a final few words and this will haunt them for years. However if, like us, they had said the simple words ‘Love You‘ at the end of every phone call or parting, then they would know that their last words to their child were special.

Like the snowman, it is up to us to enjoy the life we have and be thankful for every day, because we never know when the thaw might come!

With love and best wishes to you all.
Love You David
BB
© Baldock Bard 2017
For more from the Baldock Bard click on ‘Home’ above 
Facebook: Baldock Bard
Twitter: @baldockbard
E-mail: simon.holtom@btconnect.com

Oats Away!

Posted on February 10, 2017 by The Baldock Bard.

The last of the harvest of 2016 has left the farm. The final 12 tons of oats that had been swept up and loaded onto our trailer, left on a lorry yesterday lunchtime. To ease loading time they were tipped from the trailer into the pit, up the elevator, out of the spout and into the lorry, quicker than sweeping while the lorry waited…

Sitting in the shed,
for a week or more,
a trailer-load of oats,
swept up from the floor
Mick from L&H,
rang to see if I,
was available to load them,
I soon said “Oh yes, aye!”
I tipped the golden oats,
into the pit to load,
and within a lunchtime hour,
they were going down the road!
I’m not sure where they’re going,
in whose packaging they’ll be,
maybe you’ll see our oats for breakfast,
or have oaty oatcakes for your tea!

With thanks once again to Mick and all the drivers at L&H Haulage and all at Fengrain (the grain cooperative that markets all our grain), for their continued patience and support during difficult times. BB

The Luckiest Hare

Posted on February 9, 2017 by The Baldock Bard.

I’ve always been fond of hares, they are such gently lolliping creatures. Ever since I avidly awaited the weekly comic ‘Harold Hare’ as a five-year-old, they have been my favorite wild animal. Up to this year we even had thirty acres of grass especially put aside for them to make a habitat. The other evening, by braking heavily, I just managed to avoid killing one on the road…

The luckiest hare in Hertfordshire,
had a nasty surprise,
he stepped off the roadside verge,
and couldn’t believe his eyes!
Bearing down upon him,
on my way back from the shops,
I only just avoided him,
his luck never stops!
He raced across the road,
towards the closed boot sale site,
he’s got an appointment at the opticians,
to check his poor eyesight

Unfortunately we are also plagued in this area with illegal hare coursers who seem hell-bent on wiping these gentle creatures out in the name of ‘sport and gambling’.

Making A New Friend!

Posted on February 7, 2017 by The Baldock Bard.

Yesterday we had a family day out to celebrate daughter Siân’s birthday. Her daughter, Marsya decided we were to see dinosaurs, along with Monkey her constant companion. As everybody knows, the best place to do that is in the Natural History Museum in London. We came away with something we didn’t expect…

In a traffic jam in Knightsbridge,
Marsya’s Monkey let out a scream:
“There’s a dinosaur in the back seat,
the most frightening that I’ve seen!
What will we do if it starts to roar?
I’m off to hide upon the floor!”

By the time we were out of London,
Marsya’s Monkey had calmed down,
“What do you mean it’s pretend like me?”
he said with a quizzical frown.
Now this morning they are best friends,
(they come from the same gene pool,)
and in a Tesco bag for life…
…they’re both off to nursery school!

Have a great day and make a new friend out there (or just get in touch with an old one!)