Category Archives: Local Interest

No Headline…

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There’s one noise that drone flyers hate, and that is the sound of an approaching helicopter. In the main, planes are far higher than the maximum height of 400ft that drones fly. The near-misses so often quoted in the media are almost always at over 1000ft (a height my drone won’t fly, being electrically restricted to 395ft), so when I heard a noise I recognised while flying, I took immediate measures…

While flying my drone,
having some fun,
a noise made me shudder:
‘Dun Dun Dun Dun’
I looked around,
and I could see,
a Chinook helicopter,
flying towards me!
In a flash,
I landed my drone,
as the flying machine,
flew over my home!
It was one of those moments,
I won’t forget,
particularly thanks,
to the clammy cold sweat!
It was not a ‘near miss’,
no journalist story,
no breaking news,
not a hint of furore!

If you’re flying out there today, take care and watch out for a media headline event!
I was lucky to be trained by RUSTA – ex military instructors who taught this old farmer what a helicopter looked (and sounded) like!

© Baldock Bard 2018
For more from the Baldock Bard click on ‘Home’ above

Facebook: Baldock Bard
Twitter: @baldockbard

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The New Ceiling!

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Yesterday was spent erecting a new false ceiling in one of our small light industrial units to prepare for the arrival of a new tenant. Over the years the small pig sheds (about the size of a double lock-up garage) have been so popular that we only get to refurbish about one a year. So yesterday was day one…

Russ is in the cage,
screwing a new ceiling,
his arms flag time does drag,
in fact he’s lost all feeling!
But we’re on the home straight,
the end almost in sight,
in a day (or so we pray!)
the ceiling will be white!
Then ‘Tim’ will take possession,
the unit just like new,
Russ will say, ‘Hip Hooray!’
and exclaim a happy ‘Phew!’

Thanks to Russ for his vital help, hope the arms recover soon!

© Baldock Bard 2018
For more from the Baldock Bard click on ‘Home’ above

Facebook: Baldock Bard
Twitter: @baldockbard

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A Different Perspective!

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Yesterday I was overflying our woodland with my trusty drone. It is particularly interesting at this time of year before the view is obscured by leaves. I flew over a small pond on the outskirts of the wood that is surrounded by a large bund so it is not visible from the ground. I suddenly understood that it’s refreshing to see things from a different perspective…

It’s good to look from a different angle,
it’s amazing what you are able to see,
things from a different perspective,
not just simply Me, Me, Me!
Too many people on social media,
shout their opinions very loud,
others who may have something to say,
are often hidden by the ‘Shouty Crowd!’
But if you rise high above it,
there’s a different world up there,
ignore the politics and the bullsh*t,
enjoy the peace and keep your hair!

Have a great week and enjoy a different view!

© Baldock Bard 2018
For more from the Baldock Bard click on ‘Home’ above

Facebook: Baldock Bard
Twitter: @baldockbard

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The Intrepid Sportsman!

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I have to admit to knowing nothing at all about the sport of Paddle Boarding. However I always thought it was a sport more associated with summer or warmer climes than a Cambridgeshire river in January! Watching an intrepid enthusiast nervously tackle the weather and river conditions yesterday I could only wonder what I would do under similar conditions…

I was on my Paddle Board,
and got a wobble on,
I didn’t know what to do,
So I called my Uncle Ron!

“I feel a bit unstable,
the river’s running fast,
the wind is also gusting,
I don’t know if I’ll last.”

The last thing that I shouted,
(after a prayer to the Lord),
“I think that I’m about to be,
Man over Board!”

With acknowledgement to all those who make difficult sports look easy.

© Baldock Bard 2018
For more from the Baldock Bard click on ‘Home’ above

Facebook: Baldock Bard
Twitter: @baldockbard

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Potholes!

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Every winter the weather takes its toll on the back drive that services the farmyard and the industrial units. Every year on the first available day (often after a complaint or two!) I get bucket-loads of road-plannings and fill in the holes (hopefully before anyone shouts at me!!!). After the recent heavy rain and melted snow the holes were full of water…

Yesterday on the back track,
I was a jolly pot-hole filler,
It’s not a bad job,
but on the back it’s a killer.

I fill in the cavities
It looks like we’ve had moles!
Then a car drives by and splashes me,
And I shout at them “(pot)holes!”

Have a good day and avoid all (pot)holes!

© Baldock Bard 2018
For more from the Baldock Bard click on ‘Home’ above

Facebook: Baldock Bard
Twitter: @baldockbard

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Goose Down!

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The guard geese who patrol our farmyard have suffered a fatality. One of their ranks has gone on permanent AWOL. It is strange that they are something we see and hear every day, yet it was immediately apparent that their numbers had been reduced by one…

Goose number 13,
has run out of luck.
not a lucky number,
if you’re goose, human or duck!

Into the cause of death,
I had no wish to delve,
just went out one morning,
and only counted twelve.

No need for a casket,
or even a box,
just a pile of feathers left,
after feeding a local fox.

So there is now one less,
patrolling up the yard,
“Intruder Red Alert –
Call out the guard!”

© Baldock Bard 2018
For more from the Baldock Bard click on ‘Home’ above

Facebook: Baldock Bard
Twitter: @baldockbard
E-mail: simon.holtom@btconnect.com

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A New Year!

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There was a very famous poem written, even before I was born, that dealt with the turning of a new year. As a child, I was often quoted the first line of ‘The Gate of the Year’ by Minnie Louise Haskins (1875-1957) but had forgotten why it was deemed to be so special by the older generation. It was used by King George VI in his Christmas Day broadcast of 1939 as the country slid into the uncertainty of the Second World War. This January may (or may not), be judged in hindsight to be uncertain times, we shall just have to wait and see…

I spoke to the man who stood at the gate,
at the entrance to a brand new year,
“Can you take a look,
in that rather large book,
and tell me what you see appear?”

He mentioned some dates,
some financial rates,
some states, cities and towns,
some footballers names,
some half-decent games,
and academics dressed in gowns!
I sneaked a look over his shoulder,
my heart immediately sank,
no prophecys nor hint of disease,
every single page was blank!

Wishing you all a very happy and healthy New Year.
With apologies and thanks to Minnie Louise Haskins

 

© Baldock Bard 2018
For more from the Baldock Bard click on ‘Home’ above

Facebook: Baldock Bard
Twitter: @baldockbard
E-mail: simon.holtom@btconnect.com

 

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Carols in Baldock!

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When I went down to Baldock last night to fetch a Chinese take-away, I was in for a pleasant surprise. Next to the town’s Christmas tree was a large group of townsfolk singing carols. Suddenly that old Christmas feeling was all around and I found myself singing along as I strolled back to the car with my take-away (with apologies to ‘We Three Kings’)…

An old farmer from Baldock ‘aarrh!’
taking his take-away back to the car,
humming carols in farmer’s apparels,
hadn’t been near a bar!
It’s a wonder, it’s so right,
singing carols on a Monday night,
it’s not snowing but Santa’s going
very soon to take flight!

If I happen to forget in the mad dash towards Christmas, may I wish you a very Happy Christmas. BB

© Baldock Bard 2017
For more from the Baldock Bard click on ‘Home’ above

Facebook: Baldock Bard
Twitter: @baldockbard
E-mail: simon.holtom@btconnect.com

 

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The Christmas Cards

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According to media reports we are sending less and less Christmas cards every year. Also the annual ‘Round Robin’ letter detailing family achievements has been largely replaced by ‘Look At Us’ daily postings on social media. I must be very old-fashioned as I rather like receiving cards. Last night I recoiled in horror as I realised I’d not written a single one and so spent over four hours furiously using something called a pen whilst applying for a mortgage to buy the stamps…

Less than half the under-thirty-fives,
are sending Christmas Cards,
they’d rather use social media,
(than use a pen like bards!).
Everyone already knows,
what they’ve done each day,
it’s all played out on Facebook,
there’s nothing more to say!
Once I was caught out,
with cards I did decorate,
(I realised that at least three,
were from folk a few years ‘late’).
So if I’ve left you out,
no card ends on your mat,
Have a very Happy Christmas,
and lets leave it just like that!!

(Todays picture shows a selection of cards already received at Bard Towers!)
Happy Christmas from the Bard! (That was far easier and quicker than writing all those cards! Maybe next year…)

© Baldock Bard 2017
For more from the Baldock Bard click on ‘Home’ above

Facebook: Baldock Bard
Twitter: @baldockbard
E-mail: simon.holtom@btconnect.com

 

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Feeding the Birds!

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The other day when we were busy fencing, our neighbour, John was ploughing. Following him was the biggest flock of gulls that I’ve ever seen behind a plough. So impressed was I that I had to capture the scene with my faithful drone…

Following John’s plough,
is a large white cloud,
that descends on worms,
with screeching loud.
They communicate,
to others from afar,
“Bring all your friends,
siblings, Ma and Pa!
There are fat juicy worms,
he’s using a furrow press,
just like MacDonnalds,
with portions to impress!”

Have a good day and watch out for the gulls!

© Baldock Bard 2017
For more from the Baldock Bard click on ‘Home’ above

Facebook: Baldock Bard
Twitter: @baldockbard
E-mail: simon.holtom@btconnect.com

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