New Neville, The Trainee Estate Agent!


DesresAccording to reports in the media, as many as 77,000 new estate agents emerged out of their moulds last year. Some are asking whether this is a sign of the noughty-teens when estate agencies claim the high street from the charity shops. Others are asking if this is the beginning of boom times for purveyors of fine clothing (cheap suits for starter homes, tweed for country properties!). So watch out, an army of Kevins is bearing down on a High Street near you…

Neville is an estate agent,
Mummy is impressed,
He leaves home at 8am,
She makes sure that he’s well dressed!

He meets a couple at a maisonette,
“Ideal first family home,”
The rooms are really quite compact,
No room to swing a gnome!

His next couple view a semi-detached,
With excellent transport links,
Dissection due by the HS2,
“They won’t like that,” he thinks!

After lunch it’s a ‘garden flat’,
Round the corner from the park,
He tries to boast, “it’s as warm as toast!”
When really it’s damp and dark!

The final viewing of the day,
‘A property with real scope’
(it’s derelict, rats to evict),
“Quick or you’ll miss the boat!”

And so it’s home to Mummy,
‘A much sought-after location!’
She’s ‘conveniently located’ with supper plated,
She’s even cooked him bacon!

Thank heavens for estate agents!
While people are poking fun at them, farmers are in the clear!

© Baldock Bard 2013
For more verse click on ‘Home’ above

The Baldock Boot Sale is open every Saturday at 7am
Twenty-one years and still selling!
FREE parking and entry for all buyers, princesses, dogs and aliens!
: Baldock Bard
Twitter: @baldockbard
E-mail: baldockbard(at)
Replace (at) with @