Today I’m planning world domination. I’m not becoming a blonde-haired villain with facial scar as seen in a James Bond film. I’m planning domination of the slightly smaller world of the aphid! Our bean crop has been attacked by legions of Black Bean Aphids and I’m sending in the hired gun, James Notbond. My agronomist, David (a very tall man who doesn’t look at all like a villain), spotted the attack on Monday during one of his fortnightly crop inspections. A bee-friendly, aphid-specific chemical (costing much more than the finest malt whisky) has been ordered, and Mr Notbond (a little shaken), has stirred and is on his way with the sprayer. World domination starts here…

The Agent was called by Minister Hubble,
“Mr Notbond we are in trouble,
We expect you,
To do what you do,
Before civilisation’s just rubble!”

On his way to the field out of there,
Funnypenny: “please James take care,
Those aphids are mean,
They’re killing the bean,
If you look they’re just everywhere!”

Now that the battle is won,
We can relax and have lots of fun,
The beans can relax,
enjoy some ‘chillax’,
Until they hear the combine and run!

© Baldock Bard 2013
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